will you need me in the summer

will you need me in the spring?

and this slow moving requiem
each hit another nail in the coffin.

only the twisted moonlight
will restore
the red to my lips

don't peer your head around here.
you don't belong here.

Take your sorrows and confusion and be on your way.

This town has been cold and desolate since the singing birds have left.

you ran out of here. this was your choice.

christmas lights drape across these streets. each window is a painting.

the dragging sound of chains fills the alleys.

how many meters wide, how many feet deep
until you're stuck in the ground,
never to come around here again?

will you need me in the winter
will you need me in the fall?

the caravan moves on. the night air is bitter and unforgiving.

onwards I journey. MY oil lantern is the only heat and life here.

onwards. I stop for no one.

run, run from this empty place you once called home.

the broken windows and greyscale of this old wood will never bring the life and energy that once existed here.

the mice that scurry the floorboards and the squirrels that nest in the attic are all that you will have left.

don't try and convince me that this life can be restored.

the music is dead.

don't come peering your head around here.

you are not welcome.

beep bop

taryn JM and Steph just left. it's great having awesome friends over. god damn I love them.

nailed my interview working at the canal. we'll see what happens. hopefully i'll be able to work there and then work 2 jobs and get the money boii

don't know exactly when i'm starting work as a waiter in the village. all i know is i'm trained and am waiting for my schedule. luckily i'll be able to bike there.

me and steph found a place! in ridgewood! I'm so excited, we have a backyard to ourselves so expect rocking barbecue parties y'all =]

life is going great and i'm so grateful for my opportunity here. it'll be hard to move out and go to ontario again, but we will see how i feel when those decisions need to be made.

also, my new place has an upright piano in it! woohoo! 

now i'm just relaxing on my couch enjoying the summer breeze and this soft buzz. 

you all rock.

lovesong

it's hard to be unclear when you're emotions are rather clear. 

i know giving up your heart isn't an easy task. 

it's the way the blue shines in the morning light and the gold falls so perfectly in place

or the "whatever"s follow by the most dramatic facial features/eye rolls and a playful wink at the end. 

w

blogathon ends now right?

went to see st. fx today, that was nice.

my neighbours are great.

soon i will be reunited in montreal uhhhhh oh god i can't even wait

fuck

good night my blooming hydrangea. may the star's blue light softly caress your pedals as the wind in the trees sing you the sweetest berceuse.

hockey

jesus that was an intense game. i think i'm tired just from being so into it.

why i yell i'll never know

going home wednesday! yay!

i am dead fucking tired

old question

and then i read the sweetest message that paints the night sky in my mind.

it's not the romantic, exaggerated, bleeding heart that pulls me close. it's the way he careless crafts every cunning sentence, or the way he knows just what to say at just the right time.

the issue is that each story told captures my foolish heart, throwing my brain into a tizzy.

softly with his flaxen hair he seduces me with his allure.

romantic with embellishment yet minimalist with meaning.

what he'll do with this beating heart i'll never know; i just hope that he's gentil.

he's the shining star.
tonight is the darkest of all nights.
i am the owl.

blogathon continues!

well another night in rockland. had a great day, soaking up the sun!

spent all day lounging around, eating, doing yard work, cooking. i like being here, just to do these day to day things. all this talk of doing domestic work and people going out to farms makes me just want to spend a few weeks at a farm, y'know. the fact is i dont get this outside space, breeze, sun and solitude in montreal which kinda sucks.

i hope you guys are really enjoying your summer and all. let it be known there if a futon chez moi that any of you fools can crash on!

I don't know what else to say, i'm really preoccupied. (look at me mr. popular over here)

i love you all unconditionally

wait i need a plot twist.

plot twist: there is no plot twist

and now i want more

back in ottawa! yay!

now i'm just enjoying this dim light kitchen, peanut butter and some ravel. i'll leave this short considering i wrote a lengthy blip yesterday.

it's going to be nice to spend the next few days here, drinking tea, doing yoga, eating. maybe i'll meet up with some of you sweet turkeys soon! =)

god ravel is a musical genius.

enjoy your evenings y'all!

blogathon you say?

oh yea that's today.

well happy may first!

danielle had a rocking awesome party to celebrate her departure to BC, along with Sarah's departure to the US. i don't know what i'll do without those girls. we'll be in touch and all. i guess sometimes it's nice to have your greatest friends leave for a few months, kinda forces you out of your shell to get close with other people.

in other news linsey gave me a bunch of his clothes and some awesome kicks and i also got a bike, helmet and lock for 20 bucks!

plot twist: i'm actually leaving tomorrow morning for ottawa! yay! i'll probs spend about a week there then return to montreal to get my feet planted practicing, walking up the mountain and *shrugs* working.

so i went to sarah's in the NDG and then took an unknown, scary but truly amazing bike ride home (before we delve into that i need to say that i met the queen latifa of montreal, and she was pretty funny but overwhelming all at once and lauren (texan/californian) was like what is the person doing -confusion--- and it was pretty funny). the bike paths in montreal are just crazy, however it was a humbling experience. i really appreciated how the bike path home went from suburbs, to the park, then from the park straight into the downtown. that was nice

ah i'm relaxed. i want to take a bath but i know i really need to wake up early tomorrow... maybe i can sleep on the train home :o).

tonight has been humbling. it's shut me up. i just can't believe sarah and danny are leaving. it just really sucks to be so far from some of the greatest people you'll ever have in your life. i miss them already, yet i know that the answer is to let them be free. instead of being a stick in the spokes, i will be the wind pushing them on, supporting them always.

doing what's right sometimes isn't easy.

i just want september to come now.

*le sigh*