Christmas!

But before we begin, this is my 101st post!

Anyway, merry Christmas (even though it's early)!

Hope you guys all have an amazing few days to come, and be safe and shit!

Haha, merry christmas and happy new year, phil, sarah, nikole and krysta!

life without care

yay i love rumours so much they make me so happy!

i also love people who talk behind your back, who you thought were your friend! 

also,

people who can't get over themselves,

drama queeeeens!

people whole hold grudges for...

grade 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12....

6 years!

and people who cry for attention by constantly being upset, sad, angry, or complain!

I guess being nice to people actually doesn't really do much for you in the long run, but that's ok, live and learn I suppose.

life? great!

scholarships? yes!

work? the fucking best!

being home alone for a week? aweeeeeeeeesome!

having the car? aweeeesome!

getting the car when the parents buy their new honda? aweeeesome!

what else can i say? everything is going really well, and i am happy =].

i hope all of y'all are having fun in life and shitz. considering that the parents are gone, i will most likely host a party this saturday! we'll see though, and inviting select people, this isn't an open house/place for all the bitches i hate to be within a 10 meter radius of me! keep yo' ears open!

you know what i'm dreamin' of.

Should be:
doing law, and online.

But i ain't.

FUQ DA POLICE.

That's what's gunna get me scholarships ^ haha.

serious shit you ask?
tomorrow, I work 4:30 to 10. i don't want to.
i'm getting a cell phone, maybe, soon. should i?
i'm loving life, as usual. everything is great. =]

oh! parents are leaving this Friday, until not the next sunday, but a week after that. soooo, 9 days alone WITH THE CAR! i may host a partay, keep yo' ears open =].

that's all; i suppose i'll start working now,

but first,

tumblr!

picture?
sure.

I never bother with people I hate

that's why this chick is a tramp?

Gaga, you've raised the bar. Thanks, I can't get enough of this jazz cover. I love it (not nearly as much as Ella though).

Enjoy world:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPAmDULCVrU&ob=av2e

On to our next subject:
HOLY FUCK THIS WEEKEND.
Friday - 4:30 - 10
Saturday 8 - 1
Sunday 12:30 - 6

PLUS
6 - 7 page research project due on Monday,
along with a stupid online thing.

PLUS monday is the day we start our stupid religion assignments.

Like man, what am I doing here blogging? Haha

working is so hard, I just cannot focus. I've been working since 4, and I've got 2 pages done. What the fuck. 2 out of 6, plus reference page and bibliography. Like fack.

In other news: Drunk tank, you've lost it. I miss Griffon. Too often I find myself thinking about Griffon. She is so cute and sweet.

I am excited, next week = Mariinsky Orchestra! Tchaik's 1st and 6th, plus seeing June and Carson before the concert! And I booked off a month in advance, so yay.

Next topic: iPhone. Worth it? Am I wasting my money? Should I save up for other stuff? Is just this me being impulsive or something? Yea, probably is.

Soon, once this research paper'll be done, I'll move on. And complete the other 2 due by the end of the semester.

Which reminds me: high school is almost over and i hate you all? haha

Now, to work, then to wake up, work, work for money, work, and sleep like some baby or something.

I'm in a chatty mood.

Enjoy this cute ass thing shit dawg:

sympathetic waves

i'm sitting in the library, it's so beautifully quiet.

I had no real classes today, only music, then spare & spare, then online (right now).

Everything is going well over here, I feel a little tired, and a little used (not by someone), and I feel a little tired.

Tonight is going to be nice, I tell ya'.

I think I might get started on my law paper tonight, not sure.

Hmph.

Just checking in, saying hey and yo.

Blueblu.

it's not the pale moon that excites me

I was talking to a flower the other day.

It called itself ugly. 

I made it look at each of it's petals. 

Each petal had it's own story, its own meaning. 

I told the flower, "because you don't see how you're beauty has affected the world doesn't mean it hasn't."

The flower cried, and smiled. 

I had to go, but the flower was alive in my heart, and in the chapelle where my dreams linger, like fog.

I was crying. 

I talked to the flower. 

I was ugly, and I didn't want to believe otherwise. 

But then, the flower made me look at every spot on my hide.

It told me, "jaguar, you're beautiful. Look at your big paws, your gentile eyes, soft hide."

I didn't know what to do. 

The flower continued: "Take this, my petal." 

I couldn't, and I ran. 

I entered the holy place, the sanctuary. I talked to my dreams, and breathed in the fog. 

I approached the flower again, in the presence of an irish lady. 

Soon, that lady just became another blob in the background as the flower mesmerized me with sweet smells of baby powder. 

I asked for that petal. I needed that petal. 

I was mad, mad at myself. 

Why hadn't I just taken the petal in the first place? 

What if I never get that petal?

Then the flower whispered in my ear. 

I can't tell you what I was told, but I can tell you it was sweeter that honey, softer than velvet, lighter than air, and as delicate as a newly sown spider web, waving in the breeze. 

I got my petal. 

This petal is like a jem to me.

This jem reflects only images of myself. 

But these reflections enter my soul. 

These reflections makes me see life in a whole way. 

in other words: vmeste pour toujours.

I haven't much to say but the obvious.


Let me think... It has something to with a feeling that has been inside me for a long time now.

Oh, I remember! It has to do with Ty. Ya'know?

Value this. I think it's blue. No, not blue, but Blueblue. Like the true stuff, guys.

Everyone, stop reading. Now start reading.


Yea, I can't remember, but it's there, always.

Obviously it's the truth, and maybe it's kind of embarrassing.

Unseen or not, never forget that, please. Can't you see? It's always been there. And it will stay like that,


Forever.

It worked!

...
a little!

Praying

At my housesitting place.

Mom says I'm not allowed on their computer.


Tonight, will be a night. I hope. Tonight, I'm going to push to start a new page with mom, just restart. Otherwise, we're going in circles. Next year + moving out is all too far, and I can't hold through. Let's hope this I'll work, because I'm really on my knees now. It's tiring. It really is. It's been school, then home, then fighting, then crying, then sleeping. Rinse and repeat, and you've got my story. Why can't everything be perfect? Everyone understands, no one fights? Tonight, I'm giving it all up. She wants my passwords, she can have them. At this point, I just think, "Eric, now's a time where you have to think for yourself. Get involved with the community, set yourself up for bursaries, and scholarships. Plan out your future, think of courses, think of money, think of  your friends, and staying together."

This all out war has made me realize a few things. Like:

How important food, water, and a place to sleep is.
How amazing friends are.
How much power I have, no matteer what, and whatever my mother says, I always have choices, and can do what I want, when I want.

So wish me luck. I'll most likely spend another hour here, walk over home, and just surrender to my parents. Regardless, I'm moving out soon. I'm starting at independent soon. I'll be in the front seat of my own life soon.


Soon. Hm, why is it so long? But really, when it comes to things, soon isn't that long. After all, I've spent 17 years rotting on this world.

Oh, hi Sarah!

Mooooonlight in Vermont

Scratch that.

Well I'm in a good mood, and soon I will be driving Mike home, then driving myself home. Hopefully making a pit stop in the middle, yay liberty!..?

Gah, mom was just behind me, snuck up on me.

Does the woman not realize I need space!? Now I think she's behind me every second. This is the third time she's asked me to come out of my room and join her for quality time. AKA watching T.V. Blah, parents these days.

I was thinking earlier today, there is no way I'm living here during university. I'll do what ever it takes to get out of this house. Anything, and everything, will be done to get me out of this juvenile life, where I'm being treated like I'm 2 again.

Now I'm frazzled, so much for that good mood.

Oh it's back. How couldn't I be so relaxed with Ella and Louis singing about love, haha.

School tomorrrrrow! Woohoo, excited, how about y'uthers? Excited? Happy? I can't wait, get away from home, something to do! I'm just not looking forward to changing my courses, but once that's done, finally, school! I've been waiting, and missing it so much! yay!

that's all. time to shower and get ready to chat it up with grams when I help Mike!

yay!

No pretty picture, too lazy.

EDIT:

yea, I'll bring a picture.

Amanyx. Ya tyb blublue. I could say it in a million languages, and it'd all mean the same to me.

Nedroid!!!! <3

Life's

great. life's grand.

because,

i'm feeling so ha - hap - happy, i'm slap happy.

our love, never will die.

how'm i riding?

i'm riding higgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh.

Sarah,

and this OST is inspiring me.

I don't want to fucking grow up! Why should I!? I've got everything I need, here. Everything. Honestly, I don't need to grow up. If life is all about finding happiness, well I've found it here. ("Here" being at my parent's home, still in high school.)

I have that feeling in my heart, y'know, when you think of the future. Where your heart feels like it's an iron weight, pumping slowly, but with force, and you breathe slowly, calmly even. But your mind is going crazy, like it's out of control with so many thoughts. And all you want to do is run away, scream, kick, complain, and a bunch of other things.

I thought about university this morning after a weird dream that involved me running into a paint store after my brothers. I thought, my brothers, they're living, and it looks like they're having fun. So why don't I just try and take the approach my brothers have? (Did that really just come out of my mouth?) They didn't freak out over this stuff, over university and college, and they seem fine. And if my brothers can do it, I can do it. And if I can do it, all readers of this (yes you, Nikole, Sarah, Phil or Krysta) can do it.

I'm just anxious. It's scary for us all.

Oh there I go again, trying to diagnose this like a therapist, or Madame Clermont.

Guys, I just don't want to grow up. They say you should have curiosity when it comes to the unknown. Why can't I just be curious? Hmph. My unanswered questions will buzz around my mind like flies over a rotting corpse.

Well, I'm off to shower!

hmph.

Still not satisfied, I thought this blog post would help me get somewhere.

GRR, I'M TIRED OF GOING IN CIRCLES.

byezz fur realz mii gurlz! <33 luv ya!!!

And this

you're killing me nooooooooooooooooooow.

Hey guys, it's been a while. Infact, all too long.

Infact is two words? Fuck!

Well, I'm home. I've been all over the place recently. I'm really satisfied with this summer. Less than three weeks until school. Am I happy to see it go? A little. As much as I'll try and deny it, I miss school just a little. I kind of, maybe miss waking up in the morning, going on the bus. I miss listen to my music on the bus, and just being able to think. I also kind of miss getting home at night, and I maybe miss homework. I miss having something to do, and a little discipline. And maybe I miss seeing all your faces every morning as I walk down the halls. And maybe I miss packing lunches, and miss sitting in class.

My summer has mostly been jumping between homes and houses, hanging out with people, or long night on minecraft, doing close to nothing.

It'll be nice to see you all again, I think.

Plus back to school shopping.

I don't want to go past highschool. I'm happy here. I don't want change. The unknown is too scary. Hmph.

I guess that wraps this up, too lazy to write more, really.

Picture, picture, picture...

andddd

Enjoy!

Stop, wait, it's too late.

Blah blah blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Well, the parents are coming home... In 3 days.

And guess where I am? At Camille's, in Carp.

Gr, I need to get home, but apparently I have more work to be done tomorrow. I'm probably going to ask to go home tomorrow night when my chores are done. I still have 1 party left to host, and then I'm free to clean.

I am staining window frames here. It's an easy job, but I still have stain all over my hands. Hm, I hope if washes out or something.

I'm missing school, and I'm getting really worked up about not being home just this instant. Why am I finding it so difficult to relax? Bahhh, I wish I were in the comfort of my own home.

I will be soon though. I've been alive for nearly 17 years, one day won't kill me.

Oh fuck.

I just got reminded of my G2 test.

Time to run away and panic!

Found this on Stumbleupon, part of an article titled: "In a perfect world".

Oh this aswell is very funny:

Hi I'm Krysta

and I'm just going to post about how much my work sucks for the 5729384753847538572nd time today, like I have been everyday for the past month!

Don't mind me, just usin' my blogger like it's a twitter!

Ok, I'll post againn in... Oh 15 minutes!

Bye!

-------

x]

Alcohol

The wedding was great, had a lot of fun with the family.

The after party was better.

Reaaaaaallllyyyyyy drunk.

Now, I'm sitting alone in my house. It's pretty messy, and there is still
so
much
alcohol.

Guess who's getting drunk tonight!

I don't care if I'll be alone, it'll be casual drinking.

I mean, this is the perfect opportunity!

Anyway, thanks for your concern. I hope to speak to some of you soon. I'm kind of tired, went to bed at 3 yesterday night... Or this morning, what ever.

Now to fix myself a drink.

Talk to y'all soonz.


Too lazy to get a picture, or read over this post for mistakes.

Op. 82/N. 2 Prelude in E minor, movement 7, Allegro con forza e passione

Well it's a few days before the wedding, I'm excited really.

This blistering heat is being to kill me, I tell you. And this daunting sickness that plays the role of a teenage girl, in the sense of having ups and downs, is becoming bothersome - again, that of a teenage girl.

Everything is so stressful over here, really. Back yard weddings are hard.

Krysta is on a posting spree.
Sarah is returned.
Phil and Nikole are posting, but not so much Nikole.

The way the sun is setting tonight makes these summer trees look like they're covered in flames.

I thought the stress of the wedding would push me far apart from other people, and I'd take a lot of anger out on them, but surprisingly none of this has happened.

My mind is all over the place right now. Fuck the weather. But I know that, no matter what the temperature may be, there are still those fallen white board markers from the 19 + 8. They stay there, uncovered, hidden, but always ready when I need them. And when I do need them, they spring up with fire in their eyes, like one of Piazzolla's tango straight from 20th century Argentina.

That's thing about tangos, it's really interesting. Tangos encourage dissonance due to it's dark and enigmatic nature, but the baseline consists the same stable rhythm, whether that be dotted quarter note, eighth note, quarter note, quarter note, orrr, eighth note, quarter note, eighth note, quarter note, quarter note. Kind of like, the baseline, (such as the bassoon, yay us, phil!) is so detached to the rest of the piece, but so crucial. So the baseline might be somewhere distance, and far from the chaos of the melody, but without that baseline, the melody and inner voice leading would crumble like burnt toast. So all in all, the baseline is always there, and it doesn't matter how far the baseline is from the melody, the baseline will always keep everything together. No matter what, when, or where. Kind of like that rain on a hot night, or tea on a cold night. Or stars in the night sky, or a cool dry towel after a hot and steamy shower.

Yellow:
the sky,
is Orange.
you,
are Red.
Purple,
all over.
i won't
be Blue.

let's take off, in the blue

Oh would you look at that, Nikole blogged!

On a less surprising note, Krysta also blogged about being unhappy.

Sarah is in some foreign land.

SARAH, IF YOU CAN HEAR THIS, I REALLY DON'T NEED WOODEN SHOES!

Phillip, some of us are waiting for what "you'd tell us later" from your blog!

And here I am, fashionably late.


The wedding is coming up, I have much music to learn, with limited time. Hmpf. But, once that wedding is over, life will be clear sailing. Yay! After the wedding, I age another year, and get my G2, then the next big thing is grade 12 bitches! I think I'm going to not worry about a career after university, I'm just going to apply for lots of language based courses. I have a really really big urge to go into sciences, catch up there and have a career in pharmacy. Whaddya' guys think? I don't think I want to do law. But I would take music courses if I didn't have to play anything. Oh so much to decide.

Life is fucking amazing. Honestly, I love every second of it now - wether that be moving 10 tons of gravel across my drive way, or being with the ones I love. There is nothing I want more from this world then what I have now. Gah, I love it all, things like breathing are now so amazing. Or canned beans! Oh canned beans... <3

Oh I hear word report cards might be in. this means I need to find the mail key.

And do my chores and shits.

That is all - no picture, due to extreme need to find that mail key.

Nocturne

Last night.

This morning.

I was Florence.

I left, leaving only a note and a banana peel.

I walked with knife in hand, Debussy in the other.

Moonlight.

The cars were bright, loud.

They failed to stop me - I had a mission.

He waited.

The roads were long, scary and pitch black as far as the eye could see.

I cried under the orange lamp post.

I had my signs mixed up.

The screech of a car turned me around, and I ran.

My thin right arm had that knife.

Ready to kill any dangers, except the ones in my head.

The butler was long, but he was waiting for me.

He knew what I wanted, and led me there.

He was there, waiting with a bologna sandwich and earl grey tea.

I traded a knife for a letter.

Under the stars, Jupiter shined for us.

He knows me too well.

I slept, there I was loved.

Despite running 11km from the place of my growth,

I've never felt so at home.

The sun rose.

The time doubled.

We stared into the innocence of white.

We found our plan.

Sneaky, yes.

It took only half the time to return.

The bicycle helped.

That night, that sleep, was in my mind while rushing down Joanisse.

Now the evidence rests at the house of lambs.

I walk to my fate, as if preparing to face my guillotine.

But this time, I will smile.

I may be alone when I smile,

but I will smile.

la nocha, les nubes

It's after 9 am. It's a little dark in my room, and I love it.

Culminatings and exams went ok. The culminatings went terrible in french and religion, but I feel like I did well on the exams. My other courses were stupid this year.

In partial response to Krysta, I like Canada day. But I don't think I'm going to post a lot about it. I'm not that patriotic and I don't want to be like an American on the 4th of July. I still love this country, it's done me well.

Parents are trying close to everything to be annoying as fuck. I need to move out quick. All I ask for, is the day school ends, a night alone in my room. Obviously too much to ask, sorry mom -_-. I wish I had parents like Sarah's.

However life is so fucking great. I love those moments, when everything is just going well. And I love knowing people love me. Which reminds me, I love all you people reading these words. I'm always here for you guys, seriously.

Well, I best play minecraft and screen calls from my parents.
After that I'll enjoy my day ripping boxes and cutting grass =].

This is only appropriate I guess:

Well well well

it appears it's the end of the year, and in about 3 hours or so i'll be done grade 11.

awesome?

i'm just aimlessly wandering around my house, looking for my blue comb.

i suppose i'll see you all very soon, and i wish you all the best of luck. 

why do i have a head-ache? 

oh my god stumblr, you've out done yourself:

Returned in moon light

I don't appricate enough, it's true.
Tonight is the jazz concert, yay! I love my fellow trombonists, they always know how to make me smile, even on the worst days.

My friends, there is were I lack appreciation.

I don't want to be that guy... But:

Sarah: I know that you've got a lot on your plate, it's true. I wish I treated you with the respect you deserve. You always can make me laugh.

This is juvenile, isn't it? Bah, might as well keep going.

You have been, and always will be there for me. You mean a lot to me, whether you like to face it or not.

Krysta: You let me borrow Modern Family, that makes me happy. Surprisingly, we've stayed together since the dawn of our stories here at St. FX. Every morning, it's a pleasure to come and see you waiting paitently near your desk, waiting for the Madame to start us off with some tedious work. Not to mention you give Imfeld something to do (distract him while I steal his password on the school computers haha!)

Nikole: Yea, we do illegal stuff, but that isn't everything haha. You keep Zach busy, which is nice. You always laugh at my jokes, no matter how terrible they really are, and that means so much to me. I wish there was a way you could see really how important it is to me. Seeing your face by your bass guitar every 4th period somehow reminds me that I shouldn't stress as much as I do, and that we still need to hang out soon!

Phillip: Where to begin hm? We've only started talking in may, and became very close friends by the end of may. Things are a little rough now, I realize that - not only because of how attentive I am, but also because all of these problems that have derived from yours truly. Never forget that I will be here for you no matter what happens (the same applies to everyone else). I hope you don't hate me after all the shit I've put you through. I've been a shitty friend who only has caused your life to spiral downwards. Seeing your smiling face reminds me that I have a purpose in this world, and that just because a chapter in my life has ended doesn't mean the end of the novel is coming.

I wish highschool would never end. I will miss all of you, and I really hope that we do keep in the touch, but the future is much too unperdictable.

I'm tired of writing, and now will read wikipedia pages about composers.

Too tired to proof read my post too!

Nothing cheers me up like Debussy

Life is so painful sometimes. I don't know what to think, I wish Phil'd come sit beside me right now.

I'm easily jealous, but only for certain things I suppose.

THIS SPACE BAR CLICKS SO LOUD.

I'm sorry, I don't know what I want. My whole world is upside down, and I'm tired of living this way. I wish school would just be over with.

I don't know the purpose of this post really.

Everyone talks about the future. I'm tired of the future. If it's anything like the present, I'm not looking forward to it at all.

I'm just going to spend the rest of the period reading old blog posts.

I'll maybe post something a little more signifacnt soon, seeing as there is no way I'm doing my religion culminating this afternoon.

Poccrn 2

I really wish I were born in the 1800's.
Fuck 2011.

- That is all.

Poccnr

It turns out the bumblebee and the Philadelphia cream cheese have reunited.
I am truly happy.
It's weird things like that.
I played piano with a saint today,
I talked to a loyalist on the bus home,
and I worked with a few road menders to rebuild a broken bridge to nowhere (99901).
And I learnt about a mental illness website!

This day was so eventful, I think I'm going to watch Modern Family, and stay in my cozy room, dwelling in my happiness.

Vladimir Pachmann is my new favourite pianist.

Glass works, the queen is crazy

I told Krysta I'd do this, so I might as well haha.

Co-op culminating due Friday. Guess what I'm going to be doing Thursday night!? haha

People make me mad. I've come to the conclusion there are not smart people in this world, rather people who are better at lying than others.

I cannot listen to MGMT for more than 30 seconds.

Philip Glass makes me happy. 

I want tea. 

Parents got me margarine! Finally!

I'm insanely sleepy. 

I'm not looking forward to the next few weeks of school.

That is all for tonight. More Modern Family for me.

Thanks for yer concern.

sunday morning, rain is fallin'

Well, that's the end of another weekend me. This one was surprisingly uneventful compared to my last few weekends. I kind of just want monday to be today, I feel so useless. I don't even have any homework to worry about.

At least I have a day to just relax, that's nice too.

The Music Man was a great success, really happy with the performance! I love the pit orchestra, the trumpets and trombones were talking about music related accidents, like this one girl, she was playing her trumpet at a banquet, and the she feel off the landing, and she had two huge guys beside her who tried to help her. Sadly, behind the riser, there was a brick wall. Her horn went flying and got smashed, and one of the two guys who tried to save her broke his thumb. She was in tears, and the conductor was saying "C'mon! Play!" and she flipped him off, while still crying hahahaha.

Everyone there was so nice, I'm looking forward to be in next year's pit orchestra =].

I suppose I have to touch on something personal in my life using code words? Meh, why not. It's a tradition by now haha.

It's easy to jump to conclusions. I don't understand what you are thinking and what is going on really. I hope you aren't dead frankly. Right now, I'm thinking of the future, and I can only assume the worst is waiting for me. Actually no, I'm not even thinking about the future anymore. Well, I don't even know what I'm thinking honestly.
Either way, the second mouse always gets the cheese.
I'm waiting for your cue. Either keep me in this vamp, or tell me to go to the ending cadence.

The rain is so nice.

Culminating tasks and then exams. I am and am not looking forward to the end of the year. Guys, next year we are all in grade 12. THE END IS COMING! Should I be happy or sad?
After these exams, we will only have 2 more semesters left. There will be only one "first" and one "second" semester left. Weird.

Wish me luck on my work, y'all.

rrrew rrew rrertyy

parents are mad at me because i play piano too often. i don't understand my parents, and never will.

music man opening night tonight! go see me on bassoon!

cheese is a crazy thing. i remember when i was younger, i hated cheese, and now i have a slice of cheese everyday of my life. and i believe, no matter what is said or what is done, i'll still love cheese, even if cheese ends up not loving me back.

MOGA was a success! yay people/student council!

well, i have to be at the school at around 6 tonight, so i need to get ready and gooo, maybe take a shower.

still rivers run shallow?

really really wish i had gone to relay, seeing so many pictures already. i have nothing against the CCS, it's just staying up all night isn't my thing. i know, everyone says, you can go to bed, but it's impossible to sleep there. i gave my 20$; i hope it all goes well!

krysta, thank you so much for modern family. awesome show!

phil, your post is touching. it's sad to say though that we probably won't stay in touch. i guess all we'll have are memories. i'm learning to be happy with memories, and if let's say a friendship ends among us, i'll be sad, but i'll also be satisfied that i got what i could out of that friendship. no, this is not a cue for all of you to send me hate mail haha.

i'm excited for this weekend, it's going to be good. i still fear for the music man though... putting my best foot forward is all i can really do.

until some time soon, my few readers!

Creativity Withers!

man oh man. i hate the end of the year.

things to do:

-all my co-op work
-learn 58932759384 songs for my parent's wedding
-make a toast for my parent's wedding
-get a job back
-relay for life money (do i ACTUALLY have to raise $100?)
-that damn dance
-work on french research paper
-work on islam test tomorrow
-work on the musical that is in ONE WEEK, fuck i'm screwed
-read "small gods", the qur'an, autobiography of chuck berry, and 100 years of solitude.
-worry about changing my course selection sheet
-prepare for trombone, french, and religion exam
-did i mention piano, bassoon, and theory?

life is getting crazy, fast. i'm slowly preparing myself for a really stressful 4 weeks. i've never wanted a school year to end so badly. i wish that i could just go into auto-pilot for the next month, and i would just sleep one day, and wake up in the middle of summer vacation. oh summer vacation.

running free is a river, that slowly dries up.
all the animals are leaving.
the grass, withdrawing,
and the trees are turning from lollipops to artificial earth.
crushed rocks, and an inside out chicken is mostly all that remains in a place i used to call home.
i guess these season are wrapping into one,
prepare for the hottest blizzard of your life.
i know that the beauty of this darkened sphere will return after a short period of sitting and answering questions like:
name 5 significant things pope jean paul the second did in his life.
as long as that inside out chicken doesn't leave, it'll all be a little worth while,
like the sun needs the moon.

Waves/WHERES DA' BITCH D'EY CALL MARY!?

Liane from school let me borrow her "video games live" CD. Awesome track, and I've never had one CD give me so many goosebumps. I never thought I was that much of a gamer!

2 DAYS TIL CHICAGO. YES!

Mrs. Mulligan raged at me. I'm still unsure as to what she wants. I gave here everything but 2 things, one is day tracker things where you have to write down everything you did in that co-op placement day. I haven't handed them in since March break. And the other is some resumé, but I already said I need the photocopies because I lost mine haha.

So thrilled for Chicago, but I haven't much to talk about - I'm just trying to waste time because I'm not tired one bit yet. Well maybe a little. Or a lot.

Watched hands down, the least interesting movie in french class. So happy I chose to do a research paper not a critique. Me and Krysta kept making jokes throughout the movie, and Madame was giving us dirty looks the entire time. But honestly, it was really boring. The movie consisted of either some sort of sexual scene, or a girl crying.

WHERES DA' BITCH D'EY CALL MARY!?
*flips table*
WHERE IS SHE!?

Genius!

I was going through a Ravel stage before Liane showed me these damn video game tracks!

Nearly out of grade 5 - 1 baroque, classical and modern is all that remains. Plus c sharp minnie and f minnie in the technique.
Once I'm in grade 6 technique, I will only have 2 books left. THANK GOD.

If you guys are looking for a good laugh, check out "Hyperbole and a Half."
It is as well a blogspot!

Time to sleep for me I guess, and think of ideas for the "captains' logs" on the back of the dance sign up sheet thing. BY THE WAY, GO TO THE DANCE!

Ta ta, y'all!

I've recently been obsessed with flow charts.

Pavane for a Dead Princess

New background is Ravel inspired.

So is the title.

Tuning up, abort the earth.

Check list please!

never washing hair - check
screwing with sleep schedule - check
screwing with diet - check
adding random exercise plan - check

      Well, let's explore my new world, won't we?

Diet is now grapefruit only. No, I'm not trying to lose 12 pounds in a week, rather I am "detoxifying" my body. Life isn't fun when you can expect what will happen all the time.

The hair thing is because of my secret longing to be a jew.

Sleep schedule is the worst, can't concentrate or think at all. Plus a killer headache, but I'll live.

I hope I can find other ways to mess with my body, such as drugs!

but first I will need money, won't I? 

Let's hope I get tired of this whole messing up body thing before Chicago,

But until then, substance abuse! 

happy easter!

Consider this my personal 'happy easter' to Phil, Sarah, Nikole, and Krysta! =]

One fish, two fish

Changed background.
I'm considering changing the pattern, give me some suggestions!
abduzeedo.com/amazing-paintings-leonid-afremov
I'm think oil painting baha, check it

Until then, tata for now.

While you read this, I'll either be getting ready for Sarah to come over or listening to Drunk Tank (or both).

Now I must find a picture...

Oh I really love this one:

From the New World

Why, it has been a week or two.

I love how no one blogs besides Nicole, Sarah and I.

I have so much co-op work, still due, must continue avoid Mrs. Mulligan!

Don't want to do my french reflection, or mark tests. Blah. I actually feel pretty confident after finishing those last 2 french test. What a first, that's what you get fo' studying I suppose.

Oh, I have my very first piano student! Woohoo, I feel so popular. Now, to give him my hand-me-down books. I still must get my grade 1 piano books back from Emily Stanke. Ugh, I suppose I'll email her.

I've been cracking my knuckles a lot, and before, it was difficult to crack them, but the more I do it, the louder and easier it gets. Bah.

Thanks Sarah for all the jazzy sheet music by the way! =]

Well, that is all for now, my mind is in a different world.

Oh la la, oil paintings! 

BUY GOLD!

i've had the time of my lifeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
and i never felt this way before!
oh math class, where have you gone?

this alex boy in the skype call is funny,
that is all.

all-star was a lot of fun, met a lot of new people! well, 4. bahaha.
oboist was hitting on me, awkward.
i don't think she knew i was a year younger than her...
"what universities have you auditioned to?"
"ugh, i still haven't found my audition piece."
MHMM, NOW YOU CAN STOP BRUSHING UP ON ME WHILE WE WAIT TO GET INTO THE AUDITORIUM.

phillip, sarah! come home! i'm so lonely, and want to talk to someone about DT ep. #107. <3 joel!

i'm addicted to minecraft, and everyone in the call is yelling at me because i'm bloggin' =[.

i refuse to use capitals properly in this game.

grade 12 course selection sheet - Ok, I can't do this. Welcome back CAPS.
Anyway, grade 12 course selection sheet came out Thursday. I can't believe we are nearly done school. In my mind, it's kind of like high school is a train I've been riding for 6 years, but once university comes, it's like a dark abyss and my world turns to space, and I don't know what to do.
Who will my new co-bassoonist(s) be? I don't want to know.

Until next week y'all, now let me find a picture from my stumblr.

C'était ici

It's been a while, BUT NO ONE ELSE (besides Nikole and Sarah) BLOG.
Yay for making nouns into verbs!

Phillip, and Sarah, I need your passports.

School has been so blah. I'm tired of jazz, and Mrs. Mulligan is going crazy because I don't hand in these useless co-op things. Rage, I have to make fake notes for about what happened 4 weeks ago. Blah, I don't want to do all that work! And now I feel my heart in my stomach because I've admitted it.

That happens a lot for me. Admitting something is always the worst part. You get trapped, because everyone has the first impression when you fess up to something. And now, even if you say, "I'm all done my work," everyone is still going to see things from the first impression, when they were first told.

On the other hand, it liberates you from denying, so you can deal with it, or live with it. It takes courage to admit things. And it isn't something humans are inclined to do.

Fuck, I should've have said anything.

I'm tired of this semester. Complaining won't get me anywhere, but maybe, somehow, even when I do complain about something I know I can't control, I just wish that a god is reading my blog and grants me my wish. It's those false hopes that make everything worth while, like winning the lottery.

I shouldn't have said anything!

I want to live in my little world of denial and bliss. I want to think what I want, knowing that I can believe and say what ever I want.
I don't care what you say, your impression is set in stone.
I want to believe you. I'm happy it was you, though. I wouldn't want it any other way.

I hope everything works out for us all in the end, myes?

Dream

Well it's been a while hasn't it?
I just got a Mumford and Sons CD. 
It's nice.
So is Yann Tiersen, really moving writer. 


So how was your week?
Pretty good haha.


I've always been afraid to go out on a limb, but things are becoming a little more natural, myes?


I find myself, reaching out to others more often. I'm trying to not burn my bridges, despite how tempting it is.


Eff you madame.


Think think think...


You know, there are a lot of amazing people out there. I guess it's just looking past the skin. I wish I had done that with a lot of other people, because the more I'm with these people the more I seem to believe that man is actually created good, and that maybe there is a bigger meaning out there. I haven't figured it out, which leads me to my next topic, the curiosity of humans. it's just so fascinating how a human will try and figure everything out. I mean, does it matter the speed our universe is expanding? We just want to know and won't stop until we do. 


I like people, I like cats, I'm beginning to like theory a lot, and potentially am beginning to like appreciation. 


We never really know what we have, until it's gone. What if you wake up the next morning, only to be in a hospital bed because you feel into a coma? I mean, how surreal would that be? It's easy to get lost. especially with ourselves and our lives. What I'm really getting at is, never think you've got a horrible life, because you've got it great. I mean, a roof over your head, health care, food every night, a family who loves you (I don't care what you think, if you are reading this blog, your family loves you), an education, and friends who are all a little crazy, all a little bitchy and rude, all a little evil, but all love each other in our own a little way, dare I take the cat out of it's protective bag. We are all crazy, but pretty close knit. 


Life happens, we just need to get by these things together.

Mercury

I'm pretty sure the parents are mad at me. Don't know why. Yay for the ability to retreat to my room.

What an interest series of events in the last few days. I'm happy that's winding down.

I love Holst.

Mr. P frustrates me. First, he tells me that I'm going into grade 5 piano. Then I say I'd rather finish my dues in grade 4. That does not mean assign me more than the number of pieces needed to pass. Also, if you are telling me that "I figure out the songs quickly, but don't practice enough" that means I'm bored, not that in grade 5 we will narrow down to maximum of 2 songs a week. Like that's going to happen.

The new bassoon book I got has "Cool" from West Side Story in it (with piano accompaniment), and in that song, I have like 4 glissandos! Yay!

Yep, parents are mad lmfao.

UGH I'M JUST SO CONFUSED ALL THE TIME!

First they tell me they are all mad at Megan and not to bring her up, or things around her up and that I can't talk to her.
Via a facebook status, I find out that she came home early from France because she couldn't handle being so far from family for so long.
Now they are mad I didn't tell them, but even when I do bring things up about Megan they are mad.
Mom barges into room: nuh nuh nuh, you really hurt Peter you didn't tell him bla bla bah,
kwtfbitchgtfo.

Now to go onto my stumbler account and find a pretty picture. Let's hope this link doesn't die in the next few days like a lot others have.

To the girl i wrote a poem to:

i love you.

I heard that...

It's Sunday afternoon,
I've finished all my homework,
I've practiced my heart out,
and am extremely bored.

I'm contemplating meddling in other peoples business.
I mean, they owe me for what happened to them in a sense.
I'm getting the ball rolling for this guy,
which brings me to this guy.

Why do I spontaneously like him? I remember when I used to hate him.
But I also remember a thick rimmed pair of glasses sitting square on a teacher's nose, and I remember that teacher once saying,
"the only reason you hate someone is because they reflect things that you hate about yourself,"
So what does this guy and I have in common? and how I can I break it?

I think you and I have the same thoughts here.

It's never too late to be the person you want to be I suppose.

But why should I change myself for others? Like I'll care.

IDENTITY CRISIS AHH! This is what French religion does to me.

I should make amends with that smelly girl there.
Maybe a barrier will be pierced when she returns my books.
I was surprised to hear what I did on Friday.

This post is much too long.

In the words of Beethoven:
Rest - Eb - Eb - Eb - C

King of Swing

I know, I know, I got a MacBook Pro.
And iLove it.

In all honesty, I'm so satisfied with this bad boy, I am sure that it won't crash and destroy all my files like what happened to my PC. I'm tired of microsoft, but the still got me, seeing as ALL my computer things that worked with my HP won't work with my mac. Yes, that includes the mouse and keyboard.
FFFFFFUUUUU-

Now if you will excuse me, I need to write my resumé so I can get a job to pay for this thing.

There will be no picture attached sadly, my iTunes requires my full attention at the moment.

The Victor of Battle

Exams are done.
Thank God.
I want second semester now.

HEY BITCH.

REMEMBER WHEN WE USED TO ALL COMMENT ON EACH OTHERS BLOG POSTS, LIKE TRUE FRIENDS?!
YEAH, I DO TOO.
FUCK YOU ALL.

Stars

Well first semester is coming to an end. Am I happy? Don't know.
Music was good, well it was music, and it's not like I'm going to be missing mr. p, seeing as I'll be around him like 24/7 next semester.
Cooking though, that will be missed. All those failed cooking labs, cooking with Joe, the Mrs. Williams Nazi theory. Fighting with Zack, fighting with Mrs. Williams, and really just being with those 6 (plus Matthieu every now and then) and making stupid ass jokes all the time.
Lunch will remain lunch, including the debate between who is in the old and new group. I still say that Phil wasn't in the old group, and not really Jesse either.
Math will be missed; singing in class, being yelled at by Soucy, mocking his accent. It was a good course, well all good besides the actual work.
And then English. I will miss mocking Crete. And arguing with Hamilton.
I won't miss the drama though, and I need to find a new girl to beat insanely. LOL.
I don't think that will ever die. I guess thats just the craziness of highschool.
I AM FUCKING READY FOR UNIVERSITY THOUGH.

Another chapter close, and another opening.
It's weird to think we only have one more "first semester."
See you all at the finish line. Unless you die.

Water Game

Tried pirating Finale 2011. I didn't get anywhere. Sigh, I guess I'll have to stick with my free shit program.
I wish I had a whole orchestra in my garage to do my bidding.

On the bus, I realized how awesome Tchaikovsky is. I mean his Swan Lake is enough, but he has some much more great stuff, symphonies number 1 - 6 are all amazing. I hope I can go see New World Symphony by Dvorak with mr. P this up coming spring.

Speaking of mister P, I'm taking a grade 9 co-op with him. This will be fun, I am really looking forward to it, and it appears he is too. He has become my favourite teacher, mostly beacuase I see him everyday for at least 80 minutes and on Tuesdays, tag on another hour. Second semester I will be seeing him for 2 periods, plus an hour on Tuesdays, and the same will be with Madame Clermont minus the Tuesdays.

I'm going to have only 2 teachers next semester, luckily they're both my faves. And thank God they are split up by periods.

These are the story to my life ^