keep quiet!

i'm just sitting here.
i need to prepare my lunch for tomorrow.

everything is going according to plan!

finished my book this evening. the ending made me very upset. ugh jim why! you shouldn't have been so foolish! doc is dead! don't run out there!

sigh something about good books that are just so satisfying. next up: "howard's end"

ok well today was great. things just seem to be getting better and better. i'm really holding true to some basic things. i'm eating well, laughing, and drinking. what more could an 18 year old boy want? =]

sometimes the future makes me anxious. sometimes it makes me feel at peace. right now, i'm excited for change but i'm so comfortable in my current life style. like a lazy breeze hugs an apple tree, or how the shore caresses the beach, my life is comfortable.

wounds heal fast. i'm young; it's a part of being 18 -

i'm not looking forward to when my age won't work as an excuse, however, hopefully, i will be wiser then than i am now, and maybe i'll have more answers

but until that morning, i'm comfortable. just the right amount of questions go unanswered, just enough signals get mixed, and just a few wrong feelings emerge. i mean, the perfect life is a boring one, no?

if there is one thing i've learnt: i am a flirt. that and i am always looking for relationships to create, then see what i want to do with them. i need to curb myself a little and stop sexualizing everything(/everybody) but hey, i'm 18 and my pluto sign is scorpio. i'm still learning so much about myself. sometimes all i want is companionship without the commitment, but that's a lot harder to come by then i once thought.

actually come to think of it, i might have that exact thing...

we will see, no?

i've learned i'm not a chaser. i just wait around and pursue people that are interested in me and vice versa. sometimes i can see a new comer as an infection, and try and cut them out. it's not good, but i feel like that with my current circle of friends, that nothing really needs to change. i don't like feeling like i'm closing possible friendships, yet sometimes you need not fix what isn't broken.

again, the learning thing.

montreal, you've been good to me. the next 3 years will be amazing. then, a new city will have my name on it, and a new beginning.

slowly, slower, the flower blossoms. hairs stand up. each pedal slowly opens itself to embrace the sun's kisses, and slowly the flower rises. beautiful, is it not?

be aware: the bloom will fall off the flower. all things wither and succumb to the test of time.

strike when the iron is hot and the nectar is oh so sweet.